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Drained

Friday, November 30, 2007

Well, I did it. 30 days of posts in November. No cheating, no back-posting. I even came home early from a scrapbooking night out to make sure I got my post in! It was a little tense one Sunday evening when the power went out just as I was about to do my post--and didn't come on until quite late. But I still squeezed it in there.

I think that the ability to finish what we start is a trait that most people admire. Sometimes, though, the tenaciousness of holding on goes beyond intelligence and determination to ignorance and stubbornness.

The last few days I have been seriously questioning some of the commitments I have made. The commitments are all good things, in themselves. But are they adding up to a whole that is beating me, overwhelming me with things that fill up my calendar? Are they leaving too little time for me to "recharge my batteries," so I can be the best wife and mother I can be?

And if the answer is really "yes", which my tired self would whole-heartedly answer at the moment, which things have to go? That is always the difficult thing--the pruning. Should it be the volunteer work that helps to shape a generation of youngsters but brings no income, or some of the income-producing work that imparts knowledge and skills one might argue are equally invaluable, but which is more time-consuming?

I don't know. What I do know, right now, is that I'm drained. I have two weeks to catch up on eight months of paperwork for my eBay business. And then, when I start teaching again, what happens? Does the day-to-day paperwork get shoved aside for another year's blitz next December? The very thought of it makes me tired.

Ask me again next week. Ask me when I am not so tired. Ask me when my body stops wreaking havoc with my emotions.

But, while I will continue to ask myself these questions, I will not be doing it here. I am taking a little break, so that I can figure out which energy-draining holes in my calendar to plug.

For now, I am substituting with chocolate.

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5 comments

  1. You DID IT!!
    Hang in there, some R&R is in the foreseeable future!
    And, it's not such a bad thing to be pushed to the point of stopping to re-evaluate our time commitments and priorities. God only gives us 24 hours in a day for a good reason!
    Love you BIG bunches!!

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  2. Good on ya, girl. I echo Laurel - you did it! I hope to not see you here for a good long time. For YOUR sake, not mine. :)

    xo.

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  3. You will so love your time away for all the craziness going on now. We all need to take a step back to reevaluate what we're doing. Good of you to realize it and not keep adding to it! Hugs

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  4. Congratulations! I feel positively ashamed of my posting frequency...

    Hope you figure out stuff and get back here soon

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  5. Hey...I emailed you about those aprons...but not all the emails went through. I wanted to make sure you got at least one of them? If you changed your mind, that's ok, I just didn't want you to think I ignored you!! :)

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